Now that I have read all three books of Fifty Shades of Grey, twice, and nobody in my house has had anything to eat for at least two weeks, I have decided to leave my husband for Christian Grey.
First of all, as pornography goes, or “erotica” as this is called, it actually wasn’t that good. FYI: If you are going to be my fantasy man, I do not want to have sex seven times a day. Really, I am good with two or three solid rolls in the hay, after which I will probably want a nap.
However, there are some very compelling reasons why Christian Grey was the best sex I ever had, and why if he shows up at my door, my husband is in trouble. Men, take note:
- Ladies first. And second. Almost every time, he was a gentleman in the sack. Love that.
- The R8. OMG! He gives Ana a white Audi R8 for her birthday. He had me at vrooooom.
- The staff, especially Mrs. Jones. If I never had to make dinner again, I’d be delighted.
- The publishing company. No more fussy editors or dealing with Amazon.com.
- The house in Aspen. This would be very handy for a Colorado family.
However, the main reason I will probably not run off with Mr. Christian Grey is, he’s not George Clooney. And everyone knows I am saving myself for him.
Michelle Berman Marchildon is the Yogi Muse. She’s an award-winning journalist, a former corporate executive and a survivor of 50+ years of life. Known as the “Erma Bombeck of the Mat,” Michelle is the author of the memoir “Finding More on the Mat: How I Grew Better, Wiser and Stronger through Yoga,” and a Columnist for Elephant Journal and Origin Magazine. She is an E-500 RYT with Yoga Alliance and teaches Aligned Vinyasa in Denver, Co. Even though she is uber-fabulous, she is NOT an Ambassador for Lululemon, and has been promised she will never be one. You can take her with you on your computer or I-thing by downloading her classes from www.yogadownload.com.